Saturday, December 22, 2012

Like a Cut

Like a cut
The pain would not go.
It hurt so bad
And healed so slow.
Heartache's disguise...
A plastic smile.
Even one inch
Felt like a mile.
Stinging
A salty tear fell in my wound.
But a whisper
"It will be over soon."
Give me strength...
Enough to stand.
Through wet eyes
I saw a gentle hand.
"Get up"
Said a soft and tender voice.
"I can help you
Remember, it's your choice."
Though it felt of
pain and anguish,
It's what I wanted...
What I wished.
And like a cut
It's finally gone.
Yes I can say
Goodbye, so long.

Monday, December 17, 2012

Life

Sometimes it's a picture
Sometimes it's a song
Sometimes it's a memory
But mostly it's just that star
At first my heart just tingles
But then it stars to break
When I remember all the pain
Of when you let it break
It doesn't take much
I remember it like yesterday
The swinging and laughing
The walks and the talks
The raspberry picking and water fights
The 5am sunrise
It's funny how the heart doesn't remember the bad times
So I will trust in my Savior
For I have learned your very name is to go down...to descend
And HIS name brings LIFE
And I will choose LIFE.

Sunday, December 9, 2012

When they saw the star, they were overjoyed

[Matthew 2:10]

To seek you and be overjoyed
Is this my heart?
Traveling miles to fill the void
Where do I start?

Humbled, helpless, yet King of kings
You love me
You're worth more than all other things
You are lovely

I know the truth still I search
What am I thinking?
For things of only temporal worth
I turn from You, hardly blinking
 
Of course I'd be left discontent
You alone can satisfy
I pray Father, will you relent?
Forgive me for trying to gratify
 
I'm looking to You
Not longing to be approved by men
Let me fall in love too
Captivate my soul again
 
To see you and be overjoyed
This I pray
Traveling miles to fill the void
Starts today

Monday, November 26, 2012

I Recant

The purpose of this post is to somewhat "recant" my last post...
 
I Believe

God...I want to trust You. I want to believe that You are working out what is best for me. I want to believe that You want me to be happy.

But I just don't.

I don't trust You right now. I believe that You are trustworthy. I believe that You are sovereign. I believe that You are stong. I believe that You are holy. I believe that You are true. I believe that You are in control of all things. I believe that You are love. I believe that You are good. But I do not trust You right now.

I don't believe that You are working out what is best for me. I believe that You could if you wanted to, but I don't believe that You are. I believe that You are working out what is best for You. I believe that what is best for you is best for me by default, but I don't believe that You're thinking about me in the process. I don't believe You're looking out for my best interest. It's not about me. It's about You. What I want matters little. What You want matters all. I don't believe You are working out what is best for me.

I don't believe that You want me to be happy. I believe that You want me to have joy, but not happiness. You want me to have joy in spite of my unhappiness. I believe that You want me to endure suffering so that I understand what I do to You each day. I believe that You are purposefully not giving me what I want. I believe that You are always intentional. I don't believe You want me to be happy.

I know I'm selfish. I know I'm undeserving. I know You are perfect. I know You are worthy.

Lord, I believe. Help my unbelief.
 
 
The very title of my blog is Oh Happy Day; the verse that I've chosen as the motto of the blog is Psalm 90:1 "Satisfy us in the morning with Your unfailing love, that we may sing for JOY and be GLAD all our days!"
 
I was definitely having a "woe is me" kind of day when I wrote my last blog post.  I know that God wants to fulfill the desires of my heart.  Romans 8:32 says "He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?"

I’m going to be really real with you. I don’t always feel as though Christ is satisfying every desire of my heart. I want more than anything in the world to be a wife and mommy. I would probably give up just about anything for God to bless me in that way. There are times when I see my friends happily dating, engaged, married, announcing pregnancies, or playing with their babies…and I am truly happy for them, yet I feel so saddened that I don’t get to have that. But, right now, that isn’t God’s best plan for me. Another thing that I desire greatly is for my big brother to be completely healed from the brain aneurysm he had a year and a half ago. It breaks my heart every time I recall a precious memory of a time we shared as kids that he just doesn’t remember. Sometimes he is afraid to go to sleep because he remembers being trapped in a body that didn’t work and fears that it might happen again. I see him sad when he realizes he can’t do the things he used to; it makes me so emotional at times I just want to scream. But, God has a purpose and a plan for my brother. And, right now, God’s best plan is not for him to be completely healed.

God is good. The times I don’t feel satisfied are times that I am not allowing Him to satisfy me. Right now, as I type these words, I still have those desires I mentioned, but I am completely satisfied in Christ. I know that if I were looking for satisfaction in those temporal blessings and God gave them to me, my heart would not be completely satisfied. I would just want the next things on my list. Only when I delight in who God is…when my hearts is completely captivated by Him, am I ever satisfied.

To be satisfied is to have the desires of our hearts fulfilled. Psalm 37:4 says that if we delight in the Lord He will give us the desires of our hearts. But, until Christ is the desire of our heart, we will continually fail to be satisfied. God knows that Christ is the only One who could ever satisfy us, so that is what He chooses to give us. It is our choice whether or not we allow Him to be our source of satisfaction. I encourage you to start praying today and every day that God will help you to fall more in love with His precious Son. I promise you, that is one prayer that He will answer with an enormous YES every time! And, when He does, you will be satisfied.

Thursday, November 8, 2012

I Believe

God...I want to trust You.  I want to believe that You are working out what is best for me.  I want to believe that You want me to be happy. 

But I just don't. 

I don't trust You right now.  I believe that You are trustworthy.  I believe that You are sovereign.  I believe that You are stong.  I believe that You are holy.  I believe that You are true.  I believe that You are in control of all things.  I believe that You are love.  I believe that You are good.  But I do not trust You right now.

I don't believe that You are working out what is best for me.  I believe that You could if you wanted to, but I don't believe that You are.  I believe that You are working out what is best for You.  I believe that what is best for you is best for me by default, but I don't believe that You're thinking about me in the process.  I don't believe You're looking out for my best interest.  It's not about me.  It's about You.  What I want matters little.  What You want matters all.  I don't believe You are working out what is best for me.

I don't believe that You want me to be happy.  I believe that You want me to have joy, but not happiness.  You want me to have joy in spite of my unhappiness.  I believe that You want me to endure suffering so that I understand what I do to You each day.  I believe that You are purposefully not giving me what I want.  I believe that You are always intentional.  I don't believe You want me to be happy.

I know I'm selfish.  I know I'm undeserving.  I know You are perfect.  I know You are worthy.

Lord, I believe.  Help my unbelief.

Saturday, April 21, 2012

Verse of the Day #1

For the past couple of weeks, my mom has been talking about starting a tradition to pick a verse every day as an encouragement for Brooks. This morning, she finally decided to start! Mo of course wanted Brooks to pick out the first verse. So, she read a few verses aloud for him to choose from. At the end of each verse he would confidently shake his head "no." So, she decided to go through the books of the Bible. "Should the verse be from Psalms?" He again would shake his head "no." After going through various books, she finally asked "What about Revelation?" "Yes, yes and yes!" was his reply. If you don't already know, "Yes, yes and yes" is the answer we always get when we get something right! As all of you who know Brooks might guess, he makes sure to let us know when we're wrong :) So after settling on Revelation, they continued their search for the perfect verse to start the verse of the day trend. Appropriately, Brooks eventually selected Revelation 19:6 "Hallelujah! For the Lord our God, the Almighty, reigns!" How cool! What a great verse to be our first verse of the day!

I find it so amazing and humbling that Brooks would choose this verse for his encouragement. At first glance, the verse might not offer me much encouragement. It would seem to me to be a praise in which I got nothing in return. But I think Brooks saw much more than my little eyes could see.

You see, the verse claims the Lord as our God. It personalizes Him. The Lord is Brooks' God. He is my God. He is your God. Intimately we can know Him! Then the Lord is called the Almighty! He is enourmous and great and magnificent! He is strong and powerful and good! The verse ends by explaining that this Lord, our God, the Almighty, HE REIGNS! HE is in control! HE is the ruler!

It makes sense that the verse would start by proclaiming "Hallelujah!" And it makes sense that Brooks would choose this verse to be his first verse of the day. Brooks is in the hands of his Almighty God and Sovereign Lord! And he knows it! What shall he fear? What an incredible encouragement! A girl can learn a lot from her big brother!!

Sunday, April 1, 2012

Hands and Feet

I've loved Isaiah 6:8 for as long as I can remember. I was chatting with a friend yesterday, and she asked me what my "life verse" was. At first I didn't think I had one. I definitely don't choose to recite a specific verse everyday, I don't remember ever making a commitment to live out a specific verse everyday, and I don't think there's really one specific verse that ever comes to my mind in every situation I'm in. But I told her and will tell you: at some point in my life I do remember my heart being pricked after reading Isaiah 6:8. And ever since, every single time I read it I have the same pinch in my heart. The verse says
Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?" And I said, "Here am I. Send me!"
Even right now as I type these thoughts, the desire in my heart is only to be sent by my Lord. I long to go out with a mission for my God. Maybe Isaiah 6:8 is my life verse.

I don't know why, but recently I've been listening to a lot of blasts from the past when it comes to my music choices. LOTS of Five Iron Frenzy (I heard a rumor they're coming back by the way!), and this morning I had a craving for some Audio Adrenaline. It was funny, I just really felt like I needed to play "Hands and Feet." If you've never heard it, you HAVE to go listen right now! The chorus says
I wanna be Your hands. I wanna be Your feet. I'll go where You send me. I'll go where You send me ... And I'll try, yeah I'll try to touch the world like You touch my life. And, I'll find my way to be Your hands.
I find it fascinating that right after I was thinking about Isaiah 6:8 last night, I decided to listen to these words this morning. I'm telling you, God just never ceases to amaze me! He is just so cool!

As I listened to the words this morning I realized it was my hearts desire to be Christ's hands and feet. I also realized that I truly thought in my head I would do ANYTHING the Lord asked me to do. Then it hit me...how much I complain about what He has been asking me to do. Right now, He's asking me to be in school...and I complain about it...A LOT. My argument always goes something like this "God, there are so many hurting people who need You. How can I help them when I'm sitting in a desk all day in class or doing homework for that class? Yes I can be involved in ministries, but I want to do more. I want it to me my job right now. I want my own ministry. I'm ready to write, I'm ready to paint, I want to do this or that. Why are you making me waste so much time in school?!"

I'm so annoying. I'm getting annoyed just rereading what I typed. God must be very patient because I think He hears these words at least 5 times every week (or day =/). I do honestly believe that God wants me to be in school right now. I don't question that at all. So, here God is asking me to go to school in a comfortable place where I have friends, great professors, food, a bed, and everything I need. He has been a faithful provider, and He has never left my side. I'm not too far from my friends and family back home. And here I sit, screaming at the top of my lungs to Him "Just send me out into the unknown! I'll go to Africa or China or the remostest place on the planet! I'll stay in the U.S. and do something big. Anywhere that I can serve You (except for school)." Do you see what I'm seeing? All I can say is WOW. Not only am I annoying, but I'm a liar. I'm telling God that I will do anything for Him, and then I'm stomping my feet at His calling all the while looking for the fastest exit. Sheesh...

Isaiah 42:5-7 says
This is what God the Lord says- He who created the heavens and stretched them out, who spread out the earth and all that comes out of it, who gives breath to its people, and life to those who walk on it: I, the Lord, have called you in righteousness; I will take hold of your hand. I will keep you and will make you to be a covenant for the people and a light for the Gentiles, to open the eyes that are blind, to free captives from prison and to release from the dungeon those who sit in darkness.
"I've called You, Allie." God whispered to me. "I will use you. I will set the captives free by using you. I will touch lives by using you. I will hold your hand the entire time. I will do all of these things through you and for you. I'm your Daddy, and I love You. But first, I want you to finish school. I want you to be a witness for Me there, I want you to be a witness for Me by staying, I want you to be a witness for Me through the knowledge you will aquire there, I want you to wait until I tell you to move, I want you to trust Me."

God has a different plan for each one of us. He has each of us at a different place doing a different thing. He is sovereign and He sees you where you are. He has a plan for you, and He wants you to trust Him. He's got you, and you have nothing to fear.

Father Lord,
Today I'm making Isaiah 6:8 my life verse. When I come to any situation, the first thing I want to think is "I have been sent by God." I want to do the things You have sent me to do...without complaining. Lord God, help me to trust You. Help me to keep my eyes fixed on You. Guide my footsteps and lead me where You want me to go. Show me the way one step at a time. Let me have ears to hear you, and help me to listen and obey. Father, help me to be excited about where You have me right now. Ezekiel 34:14 says "I will tend them in a good pasture, and the mountain heights of Israel will be their grazing land. There they will lie down in good grazing land, and there they will feed in a rich pasture on the mountains of Israel." In response to that verse, Stormie Omartin writes in Just Enough Light for the Step I'm On "If God wants you in the place you are now, then there are NO greener pastures." Father God, I know that You want me here right now. There are NO greener pastures. God, You are so good to me. Thank you for choosing me, loving me, forgiving me, sending me, providing for me, comforting me, holding my hand, blessing me, never leaving me, and all of the things You do for me. God use me where I am. Let people see You in my actions, my words, my character, this blog...all of me. Let no part of me be my own. All of me to Yours; I belong to You, my King. In Your precious Son's name, Amen.

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

That You Might Know Me

For maybe the past year, I have been growing to love the words Jesus spoke in John 17:3
"Now this is eternal life: that they may know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent."
This morning as I sat down to do my devotion I was meditating on this very verse. Before praying I sat at my desk and just thought back to they way God has been working in my life. He has brought me through many hard times. I really can't even describe this God of all Comfort to you. He's Someone you can only truly know through experiencing Him. Even now as I sit at my computer, my heart races for I know that God is good! Every hurt I've felt and every gift I've thought God has taken away, I look back now and praise Him because they were all part of His perfect plan. I see now how every event was precisely placed at a specific time in an exact manner so that I would turn my eyes to the only One who could truly understand.

I know God is good. But lately I'd been feeling sort of void of this wonderful feeling I described to you before. I felt like when I talked to Him, He wasn't responding. So this morning I prayed that the Lord would refocus the eyes of my heart. I prayed that I would let me know Him more.

...

I started this blog about 3 weeks ago, and I just didn't know how I wanted to finish it. I hadn't felt God move my heart. The feelings I was having didn't go away at the snap of my fingers. I prayed and prayed and asked other people to pray for me...and I could just tell that something was off. I think I had lost my focus. I had taken my eyes off the One who gives peace that surpasses all understanding.

And instead, I had placed my eyes on earthly things. Things that don't even really matter. I was so prideful...comparing others' lives to my own and complaining to God about it. Who am I to tell God what I deserve? I deserve nothing!

I've been so blessed to have opportunity after opportunity to learn more about God these past 5-6 months I've been at Emmaus. I cannot even begin to tell you all of the incredible things I've learned about Him. Yet, my heart has shown otherwise. And this weekend I heard God whisper in my ear "Don't you know how much I love you and care for you? I am jealous for Your heart. Don't you know Me? If you knew me, you would trust Me." And it hit me...John 17:3. I might know a lot about God...but am I knowing Him? And as He whispered the words "that you might know Me" accross my soul...I felt the walls of my heart come shattering to the ground.


I had become so calloused. A beautiful friend of mine had the courage to tell me last fall that I was finding my self worth in a man who didn't really care about me...at least not anymore. Ouch. But she was right. And it had totally warped my mind into thinking that everyone looked at me in his eyes. What was I worth? Not much. But I did have half a brain to know that I couldn't abandon my God. So, I built up some walls and pledged to follow Him wherever He asked. No emotions attached, just a commitment. ...It's wearing!

I am SO thankful that my identity is found in my Savior, Jesus Christ. So what that I have no clue what the next chapter of my life entails? The Author of life itself is writing it and He has blessed me with ways to prepare for whatever it is! Who cares that I don't have a tremendous amound of friends? I have the the Holy Spirit living within me and a mom who is my best friend! Who cares that I don't have a boyfriend right now? I am the bride of Christ...my Groom cares for me with a love that words cannot express...I'm the luckiest girl in the world! So what that I'm up at midnight alone in my dorm room? I have eyes that see and ears that hear and hair on my head. I have a wonderful family and a bed to sleep in. I am blessed.

One of my favorite songs of all times is "If You Want Me To" by Ginny Owens.
The finaly verse is written:
Cause' when I cross over Jordan,
I'm going to sing, I'm going to shout.
I'm going to look into Your eyes and see You never let me down!

God is so good. He has never let me down. I've followed Him down some hard roads, and He's followed me down some even harder roads. He won't let You down either. Sometimes life isn't fun. Sometimes God allows things to happen that don't make sense. Sometimes God asks you to do things that aren't very comfortable. It's worth it...I can't explain it, but it's worth it.


Ya know...I'm not really sure why I write any of these blogs. I'm not really sure why I feel so compelled to pour my heart of imperfections out for the world to see. I guess I just want you, YOU, to feel what I feel. This is eternal life that you may know Him, the Only True God and Jesus Christ. A friend of mine's status on facebook a few months ago was "I'm sick of dead-end relationships." It makes my heart ache to know that that is reality. But knowing Christ isn't like that...at all. There's no dead end with Him. He is so fulfilling if You let Him be.

Dear Gracious Heavenly Father,
Thank You for all that You've blessed me with. Thank You for being such a Big God. God if anything that I've written is not of You, make it known. But God, if anything is of You, use me to set the captives free. Lord God, I just want people to know You. To really know You. Don't let us give up on You because of human "dead-end" relationships. Allow us to experiece the never-ending love relationship with You that You desire for us to have. Let Yourself be known, Father. Give us eyes to see, ears to hear, and open hearts. Let us not be afraid. You are a good God!
Your daughter, Allie

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

my heart IS spoken for

Jesus...
I am in awe of you tonight. I love you, my Savior. I am Yours. I do not remember the last time my heart has been so full. Thank You, my Love, for...for changing me...for loving me...for healing me...for taking this ugly and used and filthy and empty and undeserving vessel and filling it to overflowing. Thank You for choosing me...for claiming me. Jesus, You have been so good to me. I just didn't see. I stopped seeking You. I lost my heart for You. I forgot how You love me. I forgot, and I'm sorry. Thank You, Jesus, thank You for changing this leper's spots and melting my heart of stone. Thank You for breathing life back into me. Thank You for making my heart beat again. Thank You for piecing me back together with love and tenderness. Thank You, Gracious Jesus, I cannot stop thanking You. I am lost for words yet I know You know, and for that I thank You.

"Jesus Paid It All"
by: Fernando Ortega

I hear the Savior say,
Thy strength indeed is small!
Child of weakness, watch and pray,
Find in Me thine all in all

Jesus paid it all
All to Him I owe
Sin had left a crimson stain
He washed it white as snow

Lord, now indeed I find
Thy power, and Thine alone,
Can change the leper's spots
And melt the heart of stone

Jesus paid it all
All to Him I owe
Sin had left a crimson stain
He washed it white as snow

For nothing good have I
Where-by Thy grace to claim
I'll wash my garments white
In the blood of Calvary's Lamb

Jesus paid it all
All to Him I owe
Sin had left a crimson stain
He washed it white as snow

And when before the throne
I stand in Him complete
Jesus died my soul to save
My lips shall still repeat

Jesus paid it all
All to Him I owe
Sin had left a crimson stain
He washed it white as snow

Jesus paid it all
All to Him I owe
Sin had left a crimson stain
He washed it white as snow

Thursday, January 19, 2012

Triumphant Prayer

This morning I was doing my devotion, and as my eyes ran over the words on the page I found myself convicted. I read Luke 18:1

Then Jesus told His disciples...that they should always pray and never give up.

On May 8th of 2011, my big brother had a brain anuerysm. There were no signs, no symptoms that could have prevented it. He was just out golfing...and BOOM! I'll never forget that day. I remember what I was wearing, the way I had my hair, the day of the week, what I ate for breakfast... I remember sitting in the waiting room that night while the surgeons tried to stop the bleeding and relieve the pressure in Brooks' brain. I've never felt the panic or terror that I felt that day. I felt as it my heart was literally in my throat. My middle brother said "You know, you're prepared when someone dies of cancer...You can understand a car accident...But you never expect that someone's brain is going to explode."

After waiting for three hours, the doctor came in and I will NEVER forget the words that came out of his mouth. Most things doctors say seem rehearsed...they roll off the tongue...but it wasn't like that. "An unfortunate thing has happened to Brooks," he said in his Turkish accent. "There was a lot of bleeding...more than I'd ever seen before. When Brooks got here he was already 95% brain dead. The science says that IF Brooks makes it through the night, he will be a vegetable for the rest of his life." My heart sank, and I thought that was end. Then he added "But I've seen miracles, so pray."

Ferverently I prayed. How can this be happening? I don't understand. He finally desired to really surrender his life to You. How can You do this? How can this be good? Why would You give him to us at all if You were only going to take him away? Please, God, please don't let this happen. Please, Gracious and Heavenly Father, please don't let the doctor's words be true. Please, Abba, heal my brother. I love him so much. I pleaded.

...

As many of you know, Brooks is on his way to revocery! Hallelujah, the Lord is GOOD!

"Prayer that uses previously unanswered prayers as an excuse for laziness has already ceased to be a prayer of faith. To someone who prays in faith, unanswered prayers are simply the evidence that the answer is much closer. From beginning to end, our Lord's lessons and examples teach us that prayer that is not steadfast and persistent, not revived and refreshed, and does not gather strength from previous prayers is not the prayer that will triumph." -William Arthur

God does not always answer every prayer we pray the exact way that we want Him to. The doctors think that it could be TWO YEARS of more therapy before Brooks will be perfectly back to "normal." He can't always communicate things to us that he needs. It's frustrating for him and heartbreaking for us. It's tiring.


At one of Brooks' doctor appointments, the surgeon who has worked with Brooks from day 1 said to my mom "Brooks is literally a man who has come back from the dead." God's sovereign will is always the highest good for the object loved (definition from the very wise, Mr. Glock). We define good different than God does sometimes. His thoughts and His ways are higher than ours. But He still asks us to pray.

So many times I have sat down to do my devotion, and after I pray a few simple words I quick get up and run to the next thing of my list to do. I don't open in prayer asking for God to give me wisdom and discernment to understand His precious Word. I don't close in prayer asking Him to help me LIVE what I just read. I don't always pray that God will walk with me through the day. I don't always turn first to Him in a crisis. I don't always sit at His feet and listen.

Then Jesus told His disciples...that they should always pray and not give up. Luke 18:1

As William Arther said, "prayer that is not steadfast and persistent, nor revived and refreshed..." prayer that is not ferverently prayed in complete faith that God is listening, "is not the prayer that will triumph."

Father God, help me to pray like You are listening...because You are. Let me always ferverently and persistently pray...let me pray without ceasing and never give up. You are so good to me, Daddy. I am so in love with You.

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

My Heart's Love Resolution

I've never been very fond of change. Actually, I've always hated change. It's uncomfortable. But, as Jillian Michaels says in my yoga dvd, it's time to "get comfortable with being uncomfortable!"

It's that time of the year. Everyone is making New Year's Resolutions. I can't remember a time that I actaully made one. I don't think that I ever will. But, a tradition that I have rather enjoyed the past two years is to make a Love Resolution to the King of my heart.

A couple of years ago, my Bible study host told me that she prayed every day that she would fall more in love with Christ. She went on to share some of the many ways her love for the Lord had grown since and how it had changed her life. So, two years ago I decided that every day for one year I would pray to fall more in love with Jesus.

Over that year I did see my life change in many ways. And, it was very uncomfortable. But, as my Beautiful Lord tugged at my heart strings, I did find myself falling in love in so many new ways. When the next year rolled around, I wanted to experience more growth. So, last year I started praying every day that the newfound love I had found in Christ would help me become more obedient to Him.

It's funny how God answers prayers. You have to be SO careful what you pray for...or at least be ready for it! I mean, God isn't a genie. But, if you ask Him for something like this...something according to His will, He WILL give it!

I look back and giggle now, but I was so shocked when God started asking me to be obedient. "Allie, I want you to leave this...I want you to let go of that. Allie, I want you to walk alone...I want you to trust me." Ouch...as I remember back over the past year my heart still hurts. But, just as it had before, I find my heart changed. And, I'm finally starting to grasp that the uncomfortable change doesn't have to be so uncomfortable. When my world feels like it's spinning out of control, when my lungs feel as if a thousand pounds are crushing against them, when my heart stings...all I have to do is lean back into the safe hands that hold me up. The hands of my very own Creator.

Gracious Heavenly Father,
This year I pray that You would help me to let go of MY plans...because it's not about me. Everything is all about You. Help me to keep my eyes fixed upon You, my Sweet Savior. Help me delight in You and find joy in You always. Let nothing else matter in light of You. Almighty God, I am so in love with You! You are so good!